Rites of passage
Burnout is a myopic state. It clouds our vision and we become unable to see a path forward. Whether you are feeling burnt out from work, caregiving, or a challenging relationship, the solution is not to simply take a vacation. If you unwind with piña coladas by the beach, while very pleasant, you will return to the same conditions that created the burnout.
Truly transformative travel can give us some perspective about which stressors may be manageable with better coping strategies and which stressors require more structural changes in our lives.
Cultures around the world have ritualized transformational journeys as rites of passage. Whether it’s a Native American vision quest, Aboriginal walkabout, or a gap year abroad, leaving home is widely understood as a powerful tool in personal and spiritual transformation.
Transformational travel is part of our collective consciousness and people naturally gravitate toward such journeys to find guidance, wisdom, or clarity. While often these rituals occur at puberty or young adulthood, any transition from one stage of life to another can be marked by right of passage. A rite of passage may be appropriate if you’re making a career change, leaving a relationship, entering into a new decade, or are simply looking for clarity about what’s next.
If your culture lacks a rite of passage for your specific life transition or developmental need, whatever it may be, you can create your own sacred journey.
Your transformational travel experience may be a road trip, a thru-hike, a meditation retreat, a trip abroad, or something else. Just about any kind of adventure can be transformational given the right conditions. Anthropologists have studied the common themes and characteristics that rites of passage share across cultures. In preparing for a transformational travel experience, adopt what feels inspiring and leave the rest. Doing so may transform your experience from being a simple diversion with little consequence to a catalyst for meaningful and lasting change in your life.
The term Rite of Passage was coined by French anthropologist Arnold van Gennep in 1909. Gennep identified three distinct stages–separation, transition, and reincorporation–among the preliterate and literate societies he surveyed.
ACT I: Separation
The individual experiencing the rite of passage is symbolically or literally separated from their social status or former identity. Leaving home and shifting away from one's day-to-day routine is both a physical and symbolic separation from one's roles and responsibilities. Often ruptures in one's social status or identity, e.g. death of a loved one, break ups, or career change, precipitate rite of passage. The social status or identity you may be letting go of may be recognized by society, e.g. that of “wife” after a divorce, or perhaps more subtle. Perhaps you are letting go of societal expectations or of elements of your personality like perfectionism or people-pleasing.
ACT II: Transition
Often called the liminal stage, the individual experiencing the rite of passage undergoes a transition period where they have let go of their former social status or identity and have yet to be incorporated back into their community with a new social status or identity. Travel is the perfect opportunity for a liminal transition period. When you are in a foreign environment away from everyone who knows you, you are free to experiment with ways of being. You may choose to dress differently, break taboos, try on different personas, or introduce yourself with a new name. Through hikers, like Cheryl Strayed who wrote the best selling memoir Wild about hiking the Pacific Crest Trail after the loss of her mother and dissolution of her marriage, earn “trail names.” This stage often involves altered states of consciousness, challenging ordeals, or tests.
ACT III: Reincorporation
Once the transition phase is complete, an individual is reincorporated into their community with new identities or social status. This final stage of the rite of passage may involve a ceremony with your community or a party to celebrate. Maybe you’d like to celebrate your return home with your community.
Reflection Quesitons:
Another pair of anthropologists, Blumenkrantz and Goldstein, identified the characteristics that rites of passage share across cultures. We can use these characteristics to develop and shape our own rites of passage.
Paradigm shift. A rite of passage significantly shifts an individual's way of thinking and doing things. This is what we’re shooting for, i.e. transformation. What rite of passage or life transition may your journey be marking?
Rituals. Rituals can set a tone in ways that help prime an individual for learning and growth. Rituals can be simple and relatively mundane like take a long shower after getting off the plane, more symbolic like lighting a candle, or spiritual like saying a prayer or mantra. I like to set intentions prior to going on a trip, create a playlist consistent with my intentions, record my journey along the way in the form of voice notes, photographs, and/or journaling. What rituals would you like to include on your rite of passage?
Adversity or personal challenge. Challenging emotional and/or physical experiences offer opportunities to grow and learn new skills. Dutch adolescents are blindfolded, driven in circles, and then dropped off by their parents and expected to find their way back through the woods overnight. The practice, called “dropping,” is meant to be challenging. Conveniently travel often involves challenges, whether it’s a delayed flight, missed train, bad weather, or communication breakdown when things are lost in translation. Luckily, some of my worst travel experiences make the best stories and have taught me incredible lessons. What kind of adversity would you like to welcome in your transformational journey?
Silence. The din of normal human existence, which includes both auditory and visual noise in the form of social media, tv, and traffic, drowns out our inner voice. Slowness and silence helps travelers connect to the quiet voice within. Intentionally include periods of silence in your journey. Long walks alone, time away from your phone, or staring out the window of a train are excellent opportunities for incorporating silence. Where can you incorporate silence in your rite of passage?
Stories, myths or legends. I love to learn about the stories, myths, or legends of the place where I’m visiting by reading books or watching movies made or set in the place where I am traveling. I also love to consume stories about individuals who have experienced transformational travel. Transformational travel books include Cheryl Strayed's Wild, Carrot Quinn’s The Sunset Route, or Jack Kerouac's On the Road. Transformational travel movies that come to mind include Lost in Translation, Touching the Void, The Motorcycle Diaries, and Nomadland. Which media can you consume to facilitate and inspire your adventure?
Connection with nature. Time in a natural environment allows us to realize and appreciate our inherent interconnection and interdependence with nature. Connecting with the more-than-human world helps us reconnect with our humanity and the underlying patterns of birth, death, and rebirth among all things. Where and how would you like to connect with nature on your journey?
Time alone for reflection. If you’re a regular reader, you know I’m a huge fan of solo travel. Whether or not you go alone, carving out space for alone time makes space for reflecting on one's values, actions, beliefs, dreams, and aspirations. How will you make time for being alone on your rite of passage?
Connection with ancestral roots. If your culture has ceremonies or rites of passage, take the opportunity to learn about and appreciate one's connection to those of us that came before. Incorporate the rituals of your culture into your rite of passage. What rite of passage rituals does your culture have?
Play. Regular readers will also recall that I’m a huge fan of play! Shout out to these anthropologists for validating my obsession with their research. Engaging in activities that allow for true fun and playfulness will facilitate transformation. How do you intend to incorporate play in your rite of passage?
Giving away one’s previous attitudes, behaviors, etc. The movement in our minds mirrors our physical movements in a rite of passage. Changing our physical location and our behaviors facilitates a change in our attitudes. Psychologically letting go of what no longer serves us is an integral part of a transformation. What culturally conditioned attitudes, behaviors, and beliefs are your willing to work to let go of? What social status or identities are you stepping away from?
Non-ordinary states of reality. Ok, I’m not saying you have to do psychedelics. But you can if you want to. Non-ordinary states of reality can also refer to altered states that are the result of fasting, meditation, dance, etc. I would argue that awe, flow states, and true fun are also non-ordinary states of reality and seeking out these experiences in our travels will facilitate transformation. How might you cultivate awe or other non-ordinary states of reality on your rite of passage?
Obligation to service to the larger community. The goal of a rite of passage is not to leave indefinitely but rather to come back as a contributing member of a community we care about. If we are lacking a community we care about, ideally transformational travel inspires us to build a community we care about. Travel naturally helps one recognize oneself as a steward of this earth, a member of the global community, and the beautiful interdependence among us all. Reflect on your community and how it may be served by your rite of passage.